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Empty words & Empty prayers.

Sometimes Christianity feels too cliche and you just don't want to bother talking about any of it.  All the phrases you would hear in the best selling church books to the same words you would hear in almost every prayer.  All the words feel so dead.  All the words spoken seem to carry no weight at all.   As I pray, there are times when I feel like I should just shut up and stop talking.  The words that come to my mind often feel like they are only repetitions of the past, regurgitations of what I have already heard, or they are just words that are just 'safe' and familiar to say. But thank you God, for sending your spirit to intercede for us through wordless groans. Sometimes I feel like prayer should just be an acknowledgement, a submission to the intercession of the Spirit as we take time to just let Him pray for the things that we ought to pray for.  Not a passive submission but an active one.  A submission that listens so intently in the silence...
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Discipleship

It's not JUST about being a good person to be able to disciple others. Its not about teaching them how to be a good person.  Or even to teach them how to serve or what they should learn. It's a matter of having a deep relationship with God and to invite others into having a deeper relationship with God also.  It's about listening to their struggles and sins; to help them continue on the narrow path that God has set out for them.   We need to give people hope from a human perspective and let them know that God is still with them and loves them. I know good people all around me who are Christians who need to be discipled.  From the outside they look like the best Christians you can find.  Then when you talk to them, they tell you that they are struggling, they need help, they need to be discipled.   Stop thinking you need to be perfect to disciple people.  And stop discipling people like you are a perfect person.  You don't need to...

Truth

I find that I have been discovering a lot of truths in the past year.  It's been annoying knowing that I have been believing in certain lies for so long.  But those lies won't trick me anymore.  I know a little bit more now of Satan's constant lies. Sometimes I feel like I am lying to myself.  Sometimes I feel like believing in a lie would be better and easier for me.  I guess that's why they say the truth hurts. And I know that Jesus is the way, the truth, and the life.  He calls me through the narrow gate full of truth.  There are no lies down this path.  A wide path can be full of millions of lies.  But the narrow path only holds a certain number of truths.  But its good in a sense that I know the lies. Because now the truth looks much more beautiful.  And I know how unfulfilling those lies are.  How naive I was.  How much more now I must pray for wisdom.  Not wisdom in a sense to be smarter than others, but...
I tend to forget about what is eternal in the midst of all the temporal things in this world. In doing the things that are day to day, I find that keeping an eternal mindset in the midst of all that I do is very difficult everyday. Sometimes I think that if I tattoo something like 'eternal' on my arm, I will be reminded of the important things in life. But then there are things like 'discipleship' and 'hope' and all these others reminders that I need day to day that I eventually will have paragraphs on my body which I won't read because they are too long.

the cross

The heart is an insufficient symbol for love. Love is not all about good feelings and emotions. The way I love others; love brothers; is not the same as when I say I love chocolate, or that I love napping. It is too shallow. Romanticizing gives us a view of love that is too good to be true. And then there is the cross. A symbol that represents sacrifice for others. A symbol that is about forgiveness for all the horrible things in this world. The cross shows us that there is suffering amidst love. And although it is tough, and it is hard.. it is worth it. I don't ♥ you, I †  you